French Warfare

- Gallic struggles - Lost. In a war whose ending foreshadows the contiguous 2000 years of French history, France is conquered by of all things, an Italian. [Or at ths fourth dimension in history, a Roman -ed.] - Hundred Years War - loosely lost, saved at last by female schizoid who inadvertently creates The First master of French Warf are; Frances armies are victorious just when non led by a Frenchman. Sainted. - Italian Wars - Lost. France becomes the front of all and only country to ever dope off two wars when fighting Italians. - Wars of Religion - France goes 0-5-4 against the Huguenots - Thirty Years War - France is technically not a participant, but manages to get invaded anyway. Claims a tie on the basis that eventually the other participants started ignoring her. - War of Revolution - Tied. Frenchmen take to article of clothing red flowerpots as chapeaux. - The Dutch War - Tied - War of the Augsburg League/ ability Williams War/French and Indian War - Lost, but claimed as a tie. Three ties in a row induces deluded Frogophiles the world all over to label the period as the height of French soldiery power. - War of the Spanish Succession - Lost. The War also gave the French their first taste of a Marlborough, which they have loved every since.

- American Revolution - In a move that will become quite a familiar to future Americans, France claims a win even though the English colonists saw far more action. This is later know as de Gaulle Syndrome, and leads to the Second Rule of French Warfare; France only wins when America does most of the fighting. - French Revolution - Won, primarily due the concomitant that the opponent was also French. - The Napoleonic Wars - Lost. Temporary victories (remember the First Rule!) due to leadership of a Corsican, who ended up beingness no match for a British footwear designer. - The Franco-Prussian War - Lost. Germany first plays the role of drunk Frat boy to Frances ugly lady friend home alone on a Saturday night. - World War I - Tied... If you want to get a full essay, order it on our website: Orderessay

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